“You are such an autistic!” How often have we heard this sentence or said ourselves? How many times have we used the word 'autistic' to mock someone? Well, we may not have used it but we heard it around us and never wondered how problematic this is.
In recent times, people have come a long way in brushing off old conventional outlooks and sets of behaviours that we come to realise to be negative today. However, social stigma still persists in many things and autism is one of them. That is why parents often overlook the symptoms and do not contact professionals; even if they do, they tend to be in denial about the diagnosis of autism in their children.
Even people around feel uncomfortable; hence they avoid talking to autistic children which disrupts their mental growth. People often forget that this little action by them impacts the lives of autistics adversely. The symptoms or expressive behaviours of those with autism are often suppressed because society wants them to fit in the conventional societal norms. Now the question that rises, do we unintentionally force them to imitate 'accepted' behaviours from other kids?
In a conversation with the author, Tarana Anis, a child psychologist at the Child Development Center at Evercare Hospital, explained this issue of forced acceptance. "In case of imitating, 'typical' children also copy from others. But their learning process is more subject oriented whereas autistic children are more focused on objects." They are also learning but not in the conventional way, since it may be clumsy to them. Fans, lights or other objects are their primary focus. Even if the imitation is present in both, treating an autistic person the same way you are treating a non-autistic person might not help them to unlock their fullest potential.
Just like every other human being, autistic people are also unique. They have preferences and areas of expertise as well. Usually we are so caught up in helping them to fit in that we tend to forget what they need the most- acceptance. As Tarana says, "Early intervention can help the autistic children by addressing their needs and taking actions accordingly. They should be given the chance to pursue their field of interest just like any other child."
Suppose, if someone is interested in dresses or fashion in general, parents could help them by showing them ways on how they can learn to design clothes or any other fashion related products. If they like to watch cartoons, then they can also be encouraged to tell funny stories and draw cartoons. This way, their strength will be focused and their self-esteem and confidence will boost.
Assistant Professor of Dr Abdur Razzak Municipal College, Shahnaz Begum, did exactly the same thing. She created an environment for her son, Safkat Hasan Pial-- who has Cerebral Palsy (CP), to practice his thirst for cinema, music and computers. "Pial composed a book containing the list of movies and overall acting life of his favourite actor SM Aslam Talukder (Manna). He did it all by himself on his computer. We published it," shared the proud mother of the boy.
A teacher also teaches the boy computer as he is really interested in it. All of this was possible because of Shanaz's positive mindset. She believes that God bestowed her with this son because He knows she can give the boy the most love, care and support, hence, considers it as a blessing.
However, she said that admitting him into school was tough and most schools were not cooperative. They saw it as a huge responsibility or burden. But when Pial finally started going to school, his behaviour started being more cooperative and helpful. This sums up the fact that a proper environment where a child is 'wanted' by all is the most important thing for behavioural development.
"Autism is not a disease; it is a type of personality. You cannot change a personality nor suppress it," remarked Tarana Anis pointing out to the fact that autism is not abnormal.
Unfortunately, this is exactly what people do-- force the autistic children into learning more socially accepted behaviours rather than addressing their different needs like sensory processing issue, speech therapy, etc. Since different ages have different needs, a clinician can create a complete personal profile and work on different needs accordingly. Shahanaz Begum, on the other hand, believes that her son is creating earning source for some people as she has to recruit people to take care of him. Her son is happy to have created this opportunity and he thanks God for enabling him for this. Such broadened mindset should be embraced by everyone.
Statistics say, about one in 270 individuals has autism. Hence, before all the required changes, the most important thing is to accept that an autistic child is no less than 269 other children. Letting empathy sit on the throne of our persona, we can nurture every autistic child to bloom being the flower they truly are. For that, they just need water, which is love, and the sun, as in a healthy and supportive environment.
Let us create a world where people believe that the word 'autistic' holds utmost potential, talent, and moreover, blessings.
Afra is a 12th grade student at Holy Cross College, Dhaka.
iamparsha31@gmail.com